Tales from the Mischief presents
The Ceasefire
Roofy: “Look sharp, delegation. We outnumber him nine to one, and he cannot count past nap.”
Bao Bao: “Clause One. He stops doing the thing with his eyes. I cannot write down what the thing is. He knows.”
The ducks: “EMERGENCY BULLETIN. THE POND HAS EDGES.” Roofy: “Noted. Denied. Go away.”
Roofy: “We come in peace, with terms.”Tommy: “I come with a stare. It is in your terms.”
Tommy: “Clause Two asks me to apologise. To a rodent. In writing. No. Next.”
Tommy: “Clause Four. The Ceremonial Hood of Good Faith. We will never discuss this. Write that down, then eat the page.”The ducks: “WE ALSO WANT A TREATY.” Roofy: “With whom?” The ducks: “UNCLEAR.” Roofy: “Denied.”
Roofy: “He will not sign it. He is sitting on it. In cat, that is binding.”
Peace. Until teatime.Tales from the Mischief. A new sketch on Sundays.
Roof rats (Rattus rattus) are agile, cautious climbers that favour height and escape routes over a standoff, which makes a settled, unbothered cat a genuine problem for the negotiating position.[1]